Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Monotony



MAGPIE 76


 Photograph courtesy Tess Kinkaid, Magpie Tales
A long straight dusty road
Mile after mile of nothing
Except flat land
As far as the eye can see

No t junctions or side roads
To break the monotony
Of driving through
The parched hardened land

A stifling hot afternoon
Not even a hint of breeze
To help cool
Even with all windows down

A dot in the far distance
Looms larger as the
Miles go by
At last a place of refuge

Dozing man on the stoop
A slow turning turbine
Creaks in pain
Breaking the total silence





Barbara Lake ©
August 2011
Trinidad  WI

20 comments:

  1. Wonderful take on this Magpie. It certainly transported me to the plains of Kansas.

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  2. I like your poem, Bee! Great sense of atmosphere and country.

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  3. A great sense of vast emptiness here.

    I have never travelled in the states so had no idea that is what it was really like

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  4. Ohh...you have beautifully described a lonely-rough journey...Nicely done indeed! :)

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  5. Oh wow. A parched poem with a let-down ending, but not your writing, which is superb as always. The event had me wanting water, water and a bit of excitement for this narrator's end only to find a creaking, snoring, snoozing old poop on a stoop 'breaking the total silence'.

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  6. Wow! You painted a vivid work of art with your words....

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  7. I felt that one. Achingly hot and dry.

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  8. (Bee - hope you don't mind if I mention there is a typo in S2,L1, just a spacing thing. I did my comment separately if you want to change that line and delete this.

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  9. Jacqui: of you were transported to the plains of Kansas then I was able to conjure up some sort of atmosphere - and that gives me hope! Thank you.

    Nicholas: coming from you, that is praise indeed. Thank you.

    Jane: I'm glad you picked up on the emptiness. Thank you. I have never travelled through the US - I've just a lot of movies!

    Erratic: thank you

    Catfish: sorry you were disappointed by the ending - that's normally what happens when the traveller gets to the gas station in no man's land - the sweaty, dozing attendant ignores him/her...

    Helen; thank you. you always come with such words of encouragement.

    Other Mary: thank you, you were meant to! And no I don't mind at all. I couldn't make up my mind whether it was a Tjunction, a tee junction or a T junction. Mow that you've brought it up I'm going to take it out altogether for the simple reason that there would not be a t junction on a desert road! Thanks.

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  10. l too felt the aloneness, and dustiness of the long hot journey.

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  11. Wow, I love this. Wonderful imagery.

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  12. ha..oh, that is sooo true....you captured a road trip in the Midwest USA perfectly! :)

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  13. For a minute I missed the word "driving" and imagined someone walking. Then I thought of the way I felt when first driving across the Alberta prairie after a lifetime in British Columbia, which is all mountain ranges.
    (PS — I think it is T-junction, if I remember correctly from novels set in England. One road meeting another but not crossing it.)
    — K

    Kay, Alberta, Canada
    An Unfittie's Guide to Adventurous Travel

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  14. Nice one!! Long dreary roads and the monotony of driving is nerve racking and so even the creak of an old turbine can be music to the ears!! :)

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  15. You have captured that feeling well Bee this is written beautifully!

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  16. Summer feels like a long monotonous road about now. Wonderful write, B.

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  17. Lynn: glad you caught the drift

    Thingy: thank you

    Betsy: glad you think so

    jj: thank you for visiting and page and making such a nice comment

    Kay L: I wouldn't like to be walking that road! Glad it stirred some memories. Yes it is T Junction - still haven't changed it!

    Nanka: you're right

    Carrie: nice to see you - thank you

    Tess: funny in winter how we long for the heat and then...........thank you

    Thank you to you all for dropping in, reading and leaving me such positive comments.

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  18. Oh! Look! I can comment now. Yay!!!

    Love the poem and imagery. It paints a very true picture of West Texas, a more desolate place I cannot thing of.

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  19. So pleased to see you here Annie.

    I can only imagine what it must be like to be in a place such as West Texas so am pleased to kow that you think I caught it, Thank you.

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You are always welcome here . Thank you for visiting.

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